And/but

I have come to realize that there is an error to how we sometimes describe our relationship with people in our lives to others. More specifically when that relationship includes aspects that may seem like hindrances to a healthy one.

This is when we use the word but to join sentences together that contain two aspects of a relationship. For example, like many others in my generation, I differ from my parents and some family members on a few subjects both theologically and politically. Often, I hear the phrase "I love my family, but we disagree on a few things." I hear that and know that in many cases, there is absolutely nothing meant by that simple conjunction other than to bring those two statements together. However, although being a simple grammar tool, in this usage it communicates contingence. It creates a stipulation and an opening for change on some level to make the first half of the sentence more accurate or true.

I do not want to indicate anything of that sort. The love I have for my family is in absolutely no way set upon our mutual agreement on who we should elect, how we interpret a particular verse in the Bible, or any other difference or disagreement. The love I have for them would not be greater if we agreed just as my love is not lessened by any differences. It is full to the brim and is deterred by nothing.

My love and our disagreements are not mutually exclusive. They are beautifully paradoxical, coexisting and not influencing one another. It is with this truth that I peruse using a different 'sentence joiner'.

I love my family and we disagree.